As you can read my blog has basically revolved around my love life.. No joke it really has.. But that is what that keeps me writing... The strength that i need. The water to quench my thirst.. I really have fallen for someone.. Really hard and really deep. There's no way to go around it.. What i keep wondering though is how much longer will this go on? I really care.. I've been having stars circling my head for the past few weeks.. Almost giving up, almost contemplating rejection, almost crawling back into the wet, dark, lonely hole that i once came from. But why do i keep persevering? Why have so many fallen and left while i continue to fight on and try to reach her? All i can say is that i love her... i love her a lot.. Even the songs i've been writing are about her.. ( Note : My first song will be released by this Thursday)
How can someone love another so much that all they can think about is her? Don't get me wrong.. I'm not a zombie.. I have my own life to live.. I have tons of shyt thats happening this month.. Plus i have studying, guitar, blah blah blah u get the point. But there's always a still small voice whenever i'm alone. Whenever i'm about to sleep.. *call her carrot* but i would keep refusing and telling myself its not the right time... Oh how i yearn to call her up and tell her i will take care of her. That i will make her happy. That i will do everything in my power to make sure she'd be the happiest person alive.. But i can't.. I can't do it.. Once a long time ago, she let me in... But now, i can't seem to find the key to the door...
How long will she continue locking herself in the tower up there? How long must i wait till she tells me where it's hidden.. It isn't a fairytale where the prince in shining armor and majestic white horse saves the fair maiden from the darkness and dragon that guards her. Its a story of a girl that locks herself up in a apartment block and refuses to let anyone in.. Not family, not friends, not secret lovers, not even her best friend. What am i in the story? I'm the guy that she once let in.. But the door closed between us... And now i'm the guy who's throwing stones at her window, pasting sticky notes on her door, slips a little happiness and retarded faces under her door.
The one who grabs his guitar and write songs dedicated only to her. The one who tries to reach into her heart again but constantly shushed whenever i try. ( regret teaching her how to shush me ><'') The one that will never leave her.. The one that will keep trying to bring her happiness. The one who if given the chance again, will love her for the rest of my life.. And keep that promise that i made when i cried on the phone with her.
Thats my definition of happiness guys.. The aspect where i do my best to make everyone happy around me.. Especially her... Take care Bunny...
P.S. Te Queiro Mi Amour
Carrot
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